Wednesday, August 20, 2014

"Fear Not"

I was sitting in church last Sunday, and the title of the sermon was "Fear Not." Did you know that those 2 words are the most common command given in the Bible? More than "Don't steal." "Don't lie." or even "Don't kill." Why is this? Because fear disrupts faith. Fear has the ability to cripple you and prevent you from becoming the person you were designed to be. Fear also creates a multitude of other negative results including: loss of self esteem, loss of destiny, loss of joy, and loss of intimacy. Fear can even result in setting negative patterns of behavior for your children.

I had to sit there for a moment and really think about this. What is it that I want to teach my children? Faith or fear? Well, that's easy. Have faith - not fear. Growth and maturity involve taking risks and facing your fears, even if you are still afraid. I do not want my boys to have a "fear of failure." I want to them to run the race, even if they might lose. I want them to "shoot for the moon" because even if they miss they "will land among the stars."

I had a teammate give me the perfect example of facing fears. Her name is Megan McFarland, and I have used one of her stories before. She signed up to take the 1 Year Wardrobe Resolution challenge, knowing that it would be a difficult journey. She knew she may not succeed, but she took the risk anyway. When she wrote me and told me she had "failed" the challenge. I told her that she had not failed at all. Her journey was just shorter than mine. She learned more in the 3 months she refrained from shopping, than some people may learn in a year. The journey is personal. It is different for everyone. The main goal is just to take a leap of faith and see how the experience changes and grows you. What you choose to give up may not need to be "clothing, shoes, and accessories." The things that hold us back are different for each person. The goal is to face your fears and see how well you do without them. See what is waiting for you when you take a leap of faith.

Here is what Megan learned from taking a leap of faith:

"So as many of you know, I gave up shopping for 1 full year starting in May.  Well, I lasted almost 90 days.  I know, I know.  That's really bad.  I'm totally kicked off The 1 Year Wardrobe Resolution Team, however, I did not walk away from this without learning a LOT about myself and the urge to shop.  I do not look at my experience as a failure but rather a really good lesson.

~Here's what I learned~

The first 30 days are a breeze.  You are in the mindset that it's no big deal.  You don't need anything and it's not that long to go without buying anything. 

The next 60 days are a little tougher.  I attended a fashion show, saw new friends bags, bikinis and shoes and smiled with envy but continued to stay in the mindset that I didn't need anything new.

Over the next 30 days is where I hit my breaking point.  I went to Mexico and had a revaluation that I needed to go home and pretty much get rid of everything in my closest.  It was brought on by a convo I had with my sis and brother in law about my clothes and how so much of what I was wearing was stuff I purchased in my 20's and let's be honest, they looked very much like what a 25 year old girl would wear.  Not that I don't love me some Show me Your MuMu and Free People but in the words of my brother in law, "Try to Think more Stella McCartney and less Forever 21."  I came home and did a complete purge of my closet.  Anything that didn't fit-I had a lot of x-smalls and 2's that I can't wear anymore-and anything that was not nice, a staple or "too young" looking, I got rid of.   I had well over 200 items including clothes, shoes and bags that I was not wearing.  I could not believe the amount of Forever 21 and Target Items I had.  All those little trips and $40 dollars here and there had really added up.  I was shocked.  What was left in my closet were those nicer pieces including Tibi, Cynthia Vincent, Diane Von Furstenberg, Rebecca Taylor and J Crew.  It felt so good to get rid of all that stuff and actually see what was in my closet.  I can now fit all my summer and winter clothes as well as my coats in my closet.  I can't tell you the last time I was able to do this!  I've always had to store winter clothes and coats away while I had my summer stuff out and vice versa.  Such a good feeling.  I decided instead of getting rid of all these items, I would try and consign them.  I found a great place where I take home 65% of the sales so I'm hopeful that this major purge will make me a some money!  The result of this purge was a little bit of a binge.  This is when I lost all my will-power and focus.  I ordered some items that are more classic pieces that I will have and love for a long time.  

Because of this short experience with The 1 Year Wardrobe Resolution, my outlook on shopping has completely changed.  I now only want to purchase items that are really special and something I know I will have for a long time.  I also don't plan on doing it too often.  It's really about quality over quantity for me now.  

I totally encourage everyone to try giving up shopping for 30-60-or 90 days. You really don't realize how much you buy or how much stuff you never wear until you do it.  It's truly eye opening!  

I do know I have more than I could every need but I also know I have a true appreciation and love for fashion and the art of getting dressed everyday.  I always will.  I look forward to moving ahead with a new set of eyes and a new state of mind when it comes to what I wear.  I am forever grateful to The 1 Year Wardrobe Resolution and what it taught me."
- Megan McFarland  

Take less. Give more. Be blessed and inspired.
Christi Hucks